Loss of Intimacy and Hearing Loss

Everyone agrees that it’s the communication between two people that brings intimacy between two people.  All of us have who we call our best or closest friend.  We feel safe talking to them because of a bond or feeling of intimacy built usually on open communication.  This feeling develops with people we feel close to.

For some, a hearing loss can be devastating to those relationships.  This would affect more people than one may think.  Take, for instance, the sound of a lover’s voice.  If you were constantly asking “what” or “repeat that”, how long would the intimacy last?

They say communication is key in keeping a healthy relationship, and the spoken word is how we most often and most comfortably communicate.  Many people will stop communicating with those that cannot hear well, not because they have nothing to say, but because the method of communication just does not feel natural.  Even when they do not stop altogether, some people may begin to avoid conversation, which can have a huge impact on intimacy between couples.  Discussions about who likes what, where, when, and for how long, are key to a healthy sexual relationship.  Those conversations become much more difficult when one party cannot hear, or things have to be repeated.

Frustration can also have an effect on intimacy, or destroy it altogether.  If one person can hear fine while the other cannot, then that means in normal conversation, they are likely both speaking very loudly.  The one who cannot hear well does not know they are talking loudly, and the one who has normal hearing is talking loudly so as to be heard.  Most people are not turned on by yelling or getting yelled at.  People also do not always recognize due to a hearing loss, the volume of their own voice, which is generally not a problem when speaking to a person or people that can hear normally.  This can lead to a lot of frustrated repeating of words and phrases that, when intimate, the speaker may not have been fully comfortable in the first place.

Regardless of how it manifests, there’s a direct connection between hearing loss and a loss of intimacy.  Some people can adjust, while others simply make due with less intimacy, but all parties agree an uncorrected hearing loss does make things less intimate.

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